A nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket and thinks, “some asshole has my pen”
I was pro-life
I was pro-life before I met you.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she’s been told twice already
Why don’t black people go on cruises?
Why don’t black people go on cruises? They’re not falling for that one again.
What’s the hardest thing about murdering innocent toddlers?
What’s the hardest thing about murdering innocent toddlers? My dick.
I called a rape support hotline last night
I called a rape support hotline last night. Unfortunately, it’s only for victims.
What did the black woman name her 5 sons?
What did the black woman name her 5 sons?
Tyrone, Tyrone, Tyrone, Tyrone, and Tyrone.
How did she tell them apart?
She just called them by their last names.
My girlfriend’s dad accused me of being a pedophile
My girlfriend’s dad accused me of being a pedophile just because she’s 18 and I’m 32. Really ruined our 10th anniversary.
What separates humans from apes?
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip.