“I cuddle with my husband about two or three times a week.”
“Yeah? Me just once.”
“Oh, but wait, I thought you were single.”
“Ah I see. I thought we were talking about your husband.”
Author: joker
Hold your wife’s hand in the shopping mall
Life hack: Hold your wife’s hand in the shopping mall. If you don’t, she might start shopping. For her it is romantic; for you it is economical.
A lot of men will be sad that day
Girl: One day I will marry. A lot of men will be sad that day.
Boy: Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?
What do you love most about me?
“Honey what do you love most about me? My honed body or my charming face?”
–
“Your sense of humor.”
Why do they call it the “mother tongue”?
Why do they call it the “mother tongue”? Because the man never gets to put a word in.
Women are saints
Women are saints. They forgive you even when you’re not guilty!
Arguing with your husband is fun
Arguing with your husband is fun, even if he wins… he loses.
I want to buy a case of beer
Sugar, can you lend me 15 dollars? I want to buy a case of beer.
No darling. I wanted to buy myself some make-up because I want to look pretty for you.
Sugar, that’s exactly why I wanted to buy those beers.
She wouldn’t talk to me for a month
A man sits in a restaurant and cries. The waiter comes and asks what happened.
The man replies: “My wife told me that she wouldn’t talk to me for a month.”
The waiter replies, “Oh no, that’s horrible!”
Man: “Yes!!! (Sobs) Today that month is over.”
Why did you two split up?
“Oh no, Roger, why did you two split up?”
“She’s a liar and a cheat! She said she was the whole night and her sister’s!”
“So? Maybe she was.”
“Yeah, no way. I was the whole night at her sister’s!”