joker, Author at Top Funny Jokes

Am I adopted?

Son: “Am I adopted?”
–
Dad: “Not yet, it seems nobody is interested.“

I was a doctor for a while but then I quit. I simply didn’t have enough patience.

Dad – Could you call me a taxi, please?
–
As you wish, dear taxi.

I told my dad that he should embrace his mistakes. He had tears in his eyes. Then he hugged my sister and me.

“Dad, can you call mom’s phone? She can’t find it.”

“Absolutely! ‘Mom’s phone! Mom’s phone!’”

“Daddy, what is an alcoholic?”

“Do you see those 4 trees, son? An alcoholic would see 8 trees.”

“Um, Dad – there are only 2 trees.”

When somebody asks my dad how he feels, he always replies, „With my hands.“

Yo Dad, what’s up?
–
The ceiling.

Daughter: “How do I look, daddy?!”

Dad: “With your eyes, sweetheart.”

Dad: I have a very secure job. There’s nobody else who would want it.