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Top Funny Jokes

A collection of best jokes to enlighten your day

Author: joker

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

Author jokerCategories Animal Jokes, Funny Puns, Two Line JokesLeave a comment on What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

A psychic little person who has escaped from prison

What do you call a psychic little person who has escaped from prison? A small medium at large.

Author jokerCategories Two Line JokesLeave a comment on A psychic little person who has escaped from prison

My wife told me I had to stop acting like a flamingo

My wife told me I had to stop acting like a flamingo. So I had to put my foot down.

Author jokerCategories Funny Puns, Marriage Jokes, Two Line JokesLeave a comment on My wife told me I had to stop acting like a flamingo

Do you use your right hand to stir your coffee?

Do you use your right hand to stir your coffee? Huh. I use a spoon.

Author jokerCategories Two Line JokesLeave a comment on Do you use your right hand to stir your coffee?

I went bobsleighing

I went bobsleighing the other day, killed 250 bobs

Author jokerCategories Animal Jokes, Funny Puns, One Liners JokesLeave a comment on I went bobsleighing

You could be stuck

I was having a bad time once and my friend felt the need to comfort me. They told me “Cheer up, ByrdInfluenza, it could be worse. You could be stuck at the bottom of a deep hole filled with water.”

I know they meant well.

Author jokerCategories Funny PunsLeave a comment on You could be stuck

What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?

What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?

A labracadabrador.

Author jokerCategories Animal JokesLeave a comment on What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?

A body building contest

Dr Frankenstein entered a body building contest. Upon arrival he realised he misunderstood the objective

Author jokerCategories Funny Puns, Two Line JokesLeave a comment on A body building contest

People in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones

People in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones.
But people in Abu Dhabi do!

Author jokerCategories Funny Puns, Two Line JokesLeave a comment on People in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones

My wife asked me to pass her lipstick

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn’t talking to me.

Author jokerCategories Two Line JokesLeave a comment on My wife asked me to pass her lipstick

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